One thing I learned from dancing is that there are three types of people in this world.
- The ones who stress first and stress later.
- The ones who relax first and stress later.
- And the ones who stress first and relax later.
Stress First, Stress Later.
The ones who stress first and stress later aren’t that bad; they just think they are. They stress before doing anything, while doing anything, and even after doing anything. It’s kinda pointless really, all that stressing won’t help much.
They stress about their choreography, their wardrobes, the lighting, the stage, their moves, etc. ALL THE TIME. And people notice this. People notice the biting of the nails, and it’s not appealing. These people believe that the need to modify and perfect their performance needs to be constant from the beginning ’till the end, and that there is no room for luck.
They don’t realize that there is no such thing as perfection.
Never has been, never will be (yes, I’m that confident about it). People always find someway to “improve” on something.
Now, all that stressing wouldn’t be that bad if it didn’t lead to one thing;
The “all-around stressors” never show up to the performance.
They’re too busy stressing and adding onto their choreography (trying to make it perfect). And once they’re done perfecting it (which is never) they realize that they missed the show entirely.
Relax First, Stress Later.
The ones who relax first and stress later are the real screw ups. You’ll usually see them ‘acting’ very confident, and maybe even BEING very confident (in their ignorance). But guess what happens when they have to perform? They get that inkling that they really don’t know anything, because… well they don’t, and then the stress kicks in. And do you know what happens to them once they stress kicks in? Their performance looks like shit; pure garbage. What they did was relax first, not worrying about the future, believing that they are just THAT good and that luck will be on their side when the time comes.
The second group believes that everything is up to luck, but when the time comes and they don’t feel “lucky” they’re screwed. The shocker (meh, not really) being that luck is hard to come by; you can’t control it.
What happened in that criticial moment was that they saw themselves for what they were; unprepared.
You’ve got to give it to them though, unlike the ‘all-around stressors” they did at least show up to the show. Showing up is [more than] half the battle. But, they show up sloppy and unprepared. People end up asking them what the hell they were doing the entire time to prepare for the show. Having no good answer and feeling ashamed they’re left speechless.
Stress First, Relax Later.
The last group of people fall into the stress first, relax later category; the best category to be in. These people stressed first, faced the issue (and naturally felt overwhelmed by it), but through that stress realized that the only way to not feel overwhelmed by everything was to practise. They practised because their stress made them see their flaws.
They practised because they saw that they had ample time [and energy] to improve on something.
Trust me, you don’t practice unless you believe that by practising you’ll be improving on something. The brilliant thing they did was not being stressed once they had practised. The brilliant thing they did was realizing that it was pointless to stress before and after. The brilliant thing they did was realize that they had covered as many bases as they could in practice and everything else that happened from there on was more or less luck.
This group works their asses OFF at the beginning leaving nothing to chance (there’s no room for luck at the beginning/practise stage). But as soon as they’re done working their asses off they go out and perform. They perform knowing that [yes] their performance does depended on luck, but that it’s also greatly affected by all the hardwork they’ve put in.
These people are B R I L L I A N T!
They’ve realized that they are given notice in advance for a reason.
They realize that people tell them they are performing in advance so that they have enough time to stress and work on their performance first. And later once the show starts, whether or not they’re fully ready, they perform. They realize that they did their best, and that there’s no point in making their performance better if nobody sees it.
Relax First, Relax Later?
Now you might be wondering why I never mentioned a “relax first, relax later” group. Well, after much consideration I’ve simply come to believe that they don’t exist.
The stress is always present.
It’s just a matter of where it’s going to show up.
The stress is always present because if something requires us to prove ourselves, and if it’s actually worth it, the stress cannot be avoided.
SUMMARY
To sum it up, the key to having the best performance of the night (or lifetime) is quite easy.
Work your ass OFF preparing for it. SHOW UP. Then relax.
And if you haven’t quite caught on, know that this doesn’t just apply to dancing. It applies for everything in life. Study and work hard at whatever is important to you, actually show up and do what is important to you, and lastly relax. If you’ve properly worked hard and showed up, you have nothing to be stressed about.
photo credit: eflon