As I said in Part 1, dance is synonymous with life. And thus, one can learn countless things about life by examining dance. For the first five life lessons learnt through dance check part one of this two part series. For now, I’m going to jump straight to where I left off.
6. Everyone’s unique. Even if they don’t want (or try) to be, they are, and they have to live with it.
What’s rampant in dance is one person trying to dance like another person. They like the other person’s dance style and thus they try to copy them. But they always fail.
Not because they didn’t try hard enough, but because we as dancers (and humans) are all unique. That other dancer is the best at their dance style, because well – it’s theirs. And you’re the best at yours, even if you haven’t quiet discovered it.
Dancers, good dancers, realize that they can learn from their favorite dancers, but never be them. In the end, they add their own uniqueness to the style, whether they want to or not. So the best option is of course, to master your own style – no one else can dance your style better than you after-all.
And the same can be said about life. A lot of people emulate their idols, but they’ll never be their idols. They will always be themselves. So might as realize this and improve yourself to the best of your abilities. As Dr. Seuss said:
“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”
7. Gimmicks will only get you so far.
A dancer can have countless trick moves up their sleeves, but if they don’t know the basics down pat, they won’t get far.
Sure gimmicks (trick moves) will take them a certain distance, but when they’re up against real dancers (as in the one’s everyones knows and respects), they won’t last long. Good dancers know that the foundation and the basics count far more than most think, and that the tricks are a plus, only a plus, and not the main ingredient.
And the same can be said about life. Gimmicks here and there will take you to a certain point, but when you come against a real test they won’t hold. What will hold is a firm grasp of the basics of whatever you’re doing. So writers, learn your prepositions and postpositions; website designer, learn HTML; and (of course) dancers, learn the importance of foot placement, arm placement, breathing, etc.; for it’s THAT important.
8. You need close friends (a group) you can trust.
Dancers have dance groups for a reason (whether we know it or not).
The people in a dance group help each other grow in ways they alone couldn’t and act as a wall of support when it’s someone’s turn to face the [cruel] world. They are, in the best sense, family and friends.
And, of course, the same can be said about life. Friends and family will get you through a lot of things you won’t be able to handle on your own (just look to your own past for examples). As a favorite rapper of mine once said:
“Sometimes, when you can’t breathe, there are people there to breathe for you.” ~ Aesop Rock
9. You’ll lose a lot, and win few.
I’ve lost more dance battles than I’ve won, a LOT more. But I see this as a good thing. All of the people I danced against pushed me to be the dancer I am today. At the moment I danced against them, I wasn’t ready (apparent by the losses), but that’s exactly why I had to face them. If they were worse dancers than I was then I wouldn’t have learnt anything, they had to be better than me in order for me to grow.
In the moment of the losses (right after I lost each), I know I was angry and disappointed, but that forced me to go and practice; to go out and get better. And I’m thankful for that.
And the same can be said about life. Your losses (if you’re actually growing) will outnumber your wins. For each loss today will prepare you for that win tomorrow. As Rainer Maria Rikle said:
“The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things.”
10. You’ll never be fully certain.
No matter how much I train as a dancer, no matter how many hours I spend rehearsing – I’m never fully certain about my dance abilities when I get on that stage.
Sure, my level of certainty (my confidence) has grown tremendously throughout the years, but there’s always that bit of doubt lurking around deep within me.
Will I trip over an unforeseen object and make a fool of myself? Will the audience not understand my dance style? Will I spontaneously not remember the routine I spent so much time learning?
All these and more run through my head occasionally when I’m about to perform. And I know they’ll never quiet go away.
So, I’ve learnt to accept my feelings of uncertainty in dance. I’ve learnt that the best I can do is control what I can control (how hard I trained and prepared for this ‘moment’), and leave the rest as is. Uncertainty is a by product of not being able to control everything, and what you learn through dance is that you can never control everything – so might as well get used to the uncertainty.
But there is a moment when my uncertainties don’t even cross my mind – when I’m dancing; I’m too busy dancing (enjoying dancing) to be uncertain.
And the same can be said about life. You’ll never be fully confident when you do something worth doing (such as quitting your crappy job to follow your passions). You’ll have feelings of doubt, regret, and of course – uncertainty. But realize that uncertainty doesn’t hinder you from acting. And once you’ve started acting you’ll be too busy doing and enjoying what you’re doing to actually be uncertain. Your uncertainty mostly means that you’re doing something worth doing, so embrace it.
… Those are some of the few things dance taught me about life. If you’re not a dancer realize that what you do (draw, write, speak) can teach you quiet a few things about life, and it’s your job to draw these life lessons out of your craft. In the meantime, as I said in Part 1 -Go out – better the world, touch hearts, and live life to the fullest. (In other words, go out and dance!)