If you haven’t heard, I’m a dancer. In the literal sense, and in the sense of a dancer being someone who enjoys the movement of life in an artistic sort of way.
I never started dancing thinking I would learn any big life lessons (it was just something cool at the time). Yet here I am, writing about what dance taught me about life. Why?
Well, because dance and life are synonymous in a lot of ways. They both consist of movement and motion, of trying to grasp something beyond yourself (this can be spiritual, artistic, etc.- anything that makes you feel alive, outer-body, and lifted), and of enjoying yourself in the process of grasping that which is bigger than yourself.
And since there aren’t many bloggers out there who dance professionally and write about improving the self at the same time, I might as well do so since I find myself overqualified in both areas. So… let’s begin.
1. It’s not about the most gifted dancer, it’s about the most hardworking.
In dance, as in life, everyone is born with a different set of skills. There are tons of dancers born gifted. But, surprisingly, they don’t usually equate to being the best dancers around.
The best dancers are those who work hard at the art of dance. The ones who spend day and night dancing to perfect their craft. The one who’re obsessed about dance to the point that they’re dancing everywhere; cars, in line while waiting for coffee, with friends, alone, etc. (I’ve danced at the odd bus stop or two); the best dancers are those who work hard to perfect their craft.
And the same can be said about life. It’s not usually the most gifted that get far in life, it’s the most hardworking.
2. There’s no such thing as finished.
Oh, how I wished my work as a dancer was finished. How I wished that what I knew/could do was the best there was ever going to be – period. But, that’s not how it works. (That’d be too boring anyways). As a dancer you’re always pushing yourself to the next level, while realizing that there is no final level. (This is not a video game with an evil boss at the end.)
Rather than seeing this as the reason to give up, realize that this is actually the reason to keep going. That excitement you get from watching someone better than you dance – That sheer joy you get after you attain a new level in dance (one that you thought you’d never reach because it was too hard) – That camaraderie you get with other people on the same quest as you, all of you pushing each other to the next level – All would be non-existent if there was a final level.
And the same can be sad about life. There is no final level, no end goal; the point is to continue walking on the road and advance while realizing that all the joy, all the living, is in you walking (living) – not in you reaching “the end.”
3. Look at others, not yourself.
Sure, it’s fine to look at yourself when you’re by yourself, but when you’re with others pay attention to them. Really pay attention to them.
As a dancer the mirror is both your friend and enemy. It’s your friend when you’re practicing – and need to look at yourself, but your enemy when you’re in front of an audience – and need to look at other people. What [good] dancers do, is practice both. Good dancers use the mirror to improve themselves but they also practice dancing without the mirror equally, for they know that when it’s time to perform they’re going to have to know how to look at others – not themselves.
And the same can be said about life. It’s okay to focus on yourself when you’re by yourself and trying to improve yourself, but when you’re with others (through working with a group, business team, etc.) realize that you’re not the only person around and that they too matter. Constantly switch between paying attention to yourself and to others.
4. Train for all situations.
In my style of dance (hip hop/krump) there’s a lot of mixture of both freestyle dancing and choreography dancing. What you’ve got to do to stay ahead, is be well versed in both.
Train for freestyle dancing because you never know when you’re going to randomly be asked to dance (via a battle). And train in choreography because sometimes the occasion calls for a well rehearsed routine (shows mainly).
And the same can be said about life. Practice being rehearsed and spontaneous- because life is a mixture of the two. Sometimes life calls for a schedule – a set routine, and sometimes life calls for that set routine to be thrown out the window and for you to make choices on the fly. A routine in place in mandatory, but the ability to throw that routine away and take care of emergencies is also mandatory. Make sure you can do both.
5. Connect with people on an emotional level.
This is similar to looking at others and not yourself, but with a little more complexity. When one dances noticing others they’re showing that they’re not lost in their own world or obnoxiously self-centered. In return, the person/people you’re aware of also give you their attention. You started by recognizing they exist, and they reciprocate – creating this moment where both of you are open to each others ideas and thoughts. Now what you must do is take it to the next level; You have to connect with them emotionally.
Dancers know that when you’re dancing (especially when you’re freestyle dancing), the mood counts. Is it a happy mood? A sad one? A calm one? Or an energetic one? What the dancer tries to do is connect with this mood, and hopefully take it to the next level through their dance. For example, if it’s an energetic mood, the dancer dances energetically – adding on to what people already feel/know and thus being better understood, better liked, and better connected with the audience.
And the same can be said about life. When you have someone’s attention realize that it’s not all about you. Sure you can go and talk about whatever you want, but realize that you’ll best connect with your listeners by expanding on what they know and what they’re currently feeling emotionally (for we’re humans, and we’re emotional). Shape your message so that the present audience can better grasp it. You wouldn’t explain gravity to college students the same way you would to a curious six year old girl now would you?
6. …
Almost got too carried away there. This post is pretty long as is, so come back next week for the remaining 5 life lessons I learnt from dance in Part 2. For now, go out – better the world, touch hearts, and live life to the fullest in the process. (In other words, go out and dance!)